EDMONTON — Perfect vision. I once had it, but when I turned forty, my vision gradually began to blur. I went instantly from good vision to bifocals.

All of a sudden, I couldn’t read the menu in a restaurant without holding it at arm’s length. I couldn’t read the newspaper or a novel without finding the right distance. Evidently, I wore out my eyes reading hundreds of students’ essays during those first twenty years of my career. For whatever the reason, I joined the world of my mother and father the day I put on my first pair of glasses.

Bifocals set my world into focus, but out of balance. I stepped off sidewalks where there were no steps. I walked straight off edges that weren’t straight. “Those glasses are going to get you killed,” Guy warned. Because my new glasses distorted my perception, so I stepped high for the first few days like a member of a marching band. I also caught myself looking over my glasses like I had seen so many of my teachers do when they were not believing an excuse.

Not having a comfortable fit is maddening. I have never had a pair that I didn’t know I was wearing. Some pinched my nose; others left indentations in my head. Lenses have fallen out in on airplanes and in malls. Frames have broken and I have had to tape them together. One side of my head must sit higher than the other because the last two pairs have felt lopsided.

Choosing a frame can take a long time, especially if you can’t see without your glasses. I have finally succumbed to the ladies who fit glasses to help me choose mine-no matter where I buy them. Because the last pair is so heavy, I take them on and off to give my face a rest.

A few years ago I decided to wear contacts. Didn’t work. Over a period of two years, I went to three different optometrists and one ophthalmologist, searching for someone who could bring the two of us together. Didn’t happen.

First, I tried to wear bifocal contacts, but I could neither read nor see across the road. I could barely walk. Then I wore one kind in one eye and another in the other. One was for close up and one for distance. That method made me dizzy and I still couldn’t see. The ophthalmologist actually sent me to Lens Crafters who could not craft a fit for me either. I spent a lot of money trying to wear contacts.

During those months, I also struggled with putting them in my eye. The first set took forever. I rolled those things around and wet them down so much, they were sagging on my eyeballs most of the time. I dropped one on my top that I didn’t find until Guy noticed it on the collar of my blouse. “Why don’t you give up,” he declared. I don’t give up easily.

The worst experience was when one stuck in the back of my eye. Well, maybe not the back, but certainly beyond where I could see it or Guy could find it with a flashlight. One of my doctors had to remove the sliver that had broken off from the main part of the contact. My eye hurt after that experience.

I want to be like Mary Tyler Moore and walk out my front door and toss my glasses into the air (instead of a toboggan). I long for freedom to wear real sunglasses or go swimming and see a shark if it approaches. I wish I could look through a pair of binoculars and see the zoomed target clearly, or find my glasses when I take them off without feeling around for them as if I were in the dark.

For those of us who wear glasses, we know they come to be part of our identity. When I tried contacts, I didn’t “look like myself”. I wanted to say, “You didn’t know “myself” back when I didn’t wear glasses.” Every time I change frames, people noticed. “Don’t you have new glasses?” Wearing glasses has now become more fashionable and movie stars have helped that evolution. So there isn’t as much stigma to wearing glasses as there once was. For all the children who have to wear them, that is a good thing.

This brings me to my purpose. January is National Eye Care Month. The most precious gifts are sometimes taken for granted. I didn’t appreciate having 20/20 vision until I didn’t have it anymore. I am thankful for the “eye doctors” in my life. Send your favorite doctor a thank you note today for helping you see life a little more clearly. They need to “see” that we appreciate them.

Contact Carol at cperkins(at)scrtc.com. Her book, Let’s Talk About … is available at Ivy Bookstore in Glasgow.