By JON WEBB and ASHLEY SCOBY
GLASGOW — Webb’s picks
I’m bored with the NFL.
The last two weeks have produced resting-starter teams, wholly unrealistic game results (see: Buffalo Bills 30, Indianapolis Colts 7) and incessant ESPN-opining about the emotional state of the Minnesota Vikings locker room.
But, alas, the playoffs have arrived and it’s finally time for good football — and bad predictions.
None of the following has a solid chance of actually happening, but here are some best guesses for Wild Card weekend.
Home teams listed first.
Bengals (!) vs. Jets
Winner: Bengals
Why?: The Jets have their “swagger” back. This is not a good thing.
After New York opened the season 3-0, the New York Daily News, afternoon football broadcasts and linebacker Bart Scott spoke incessantly about the Jets’ swagger: a completely unmeasurable quality that supposedly gave the team a leg up against any non-swagger-laden opponent.
At the height of their swagger-dom, the Jets lost it, along with six of their next seven games.
Well, guess what? The insufferable swagger is back and on Wednesday head coach Rex Ryan deemed New York the favorites to take the Super Bowl.
The team does possess one of the best defenses in the league and boasts the highest per-game rushing average in the NFL (172.3). But they also posses an erratic low-production passing game that will surely struggle against the Bengals’ (!) solid secondary.
Do the Bengals have an erratic passing game? Sure, but they also have Carson Palmer, who will have a vested interest in burying any lasting memory of his previous, knee-obliterating playoff experience.
Go Bengals.
Patriots vs. Ravens
Winner: Patriots
Why?: Many people (including Scoby, Ashley) are choosing the Ravens, presumably on the strength of their defense. After all, New England doesn’t have a viable one-man option in its running game, Wes Welker is currently rocking one useable knee and Tom Brady is allegedly sporting a flak jacket to protect three allegedly broken ribs, which won’t hold up well against Ray Lewis.
Given all this, the Ravens do seem like a good choice, but I’ll still go with the Patriots. Sometimes things just can’t make sense.
Cowboys vs. Eagles
Winner: Cowboys
Why?: We all know the story here.
The Cowboys haven’t won a playoff game in 13 years. Tony Romo is a regular season quarterback. The Cowboys administered a Pennsylvania-sized beating (I may have that backwards) to the Eagles on Sunday.
Sportswriter cliches would steer you toward the Eagles. It’s hard to beat a team three times in one season, let alone beat them in consecutive weeks. Give Andy Reid two weeks to prepare and ...
The reality, however, is the Cowboys have beat the Eagles twice. Romo has thrown for more than 300 yards in each game, while Donovan McNabb hasn’t come close to that mark. The often-sacked McNabb will also have to worry about Dallas’ DeMarcus Ware coming around the corner.
The biggest issue here is Wade Phillips, an awfully-nice man who will get ruthlessly canned if the Cowboys are eliminated. Phillips is in the final year of his contract and is dependent on a team-option to return for another. Jerry Jones recently wasted (spent) $1.15 billion dollars on fancy-new Cowboys Stadium. I’m sure he’d like to get his money’s worth by seeing his team advance in the playoffs. If Phillips can’t deliver, Jones will have no problem buying himself a fancy-new coach.
Cardinals vs. Packers
Winner: Packers
Why?: This game should be fun to watch with two elite passing games clashing in a retractable stadium.
The offenses will have little to do with the outcome, though, as the Packers’ Charles Woodson will do his best to render Arizona receiver Larry Fitzgerald a non-factor, leaving other Arizona receiver Anquan Boldin free to be double-teamed.
If this happens, the Cardinals will have to depend on receiver Steve Breaston and running back Beanie Wells to carry them to victory. This, to me, doesn’t sound logical.
Scoby’s picks
Bengals vs. Jets
Winner: Bengals
Patriots vs. Ravens
Winner: Ravens
Cowboys vs. Eagles
Winner: Cowboys
Cardinals vs. Packers
Winner: Packers
